it's been a sickly start to the new year, and i can only hope my bouts with food poisoning and influenza don't serve as prophetic visions of a dire year to come. i am wholly recovered from the intestinal drano i ingested nearly two weeks ago, consisting of a medium-rare burger and later, spicy raw shrimp; and i am nearly wholly recovered from the flu-bug which attacked me a week ago, leaving me sweaty, shivering, dizzy, and drugged out of my mind. whether my general apathy with coursework this quarter is due in large part to my rough start remains uncertain, although i highly suspect a strong abhorrence with statistics and mindless busywork is one key contributing factor. i eagerly await the moment i fall into the groove of learning, and it's been quite some time since i thoroughly disliked something i was studying. i want to read, to research, to write, and to publish, and while it appears i was led to believe i could accomplish some form of that and soon, bureaucratic obstacles threaten my patience and sanity.
i can stand brute force, but brute reason is quite unbearable.
there is something unfair about its use. it is hitting below the intellect.
: wilde.
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